The Fawn Response: A Trauma Therapist’s Perspective on The Sean Combs Case

Disclaimer: I am not an expert on this case, understand these are “allegations” of abuse, and acknowledge that I am educated on this case solely by consumption of the news. I am only speaking to my experience of absorbing this news story.

As Spring 2025 came into view, the stories of Sean “Diddy” Combs’ various abuses took over my timeline across the internet. These allegations, ranging from racketeering to sex trafficking and violence against his intimate partners, commanded the attention of much of the country. 

I sat in my Brooklyn office, taking in the story and the reactions that followed. I tracked the case’s progress, reading new developments as witnesses – and in many cases, survivors – took the stand. I often find myself feeling extra invested in the outcome of sexual abuse cases in the media, and this was no different.  

I am someone who has healed from trauma and has been privileged enough to be involved in many others’ recovery. I live my life supporting survivors through their own trauma, through the rollercoaster that is the healing journey. I feel a kinship with survivors and, while everyone’s story is different, there are always elements of others’ experiences with abuse that feel familiar to survivors of sexual violence. 

One familiar element in the Combs case was, what I understand as, the “Fawn” trauma response exhibited by survivors of the abuse. In this article, I offer education about this trauma response and how it relates to recovery. While “Fawn” is a common trauma response, it often comes with feelings of shame and self-blame which impede healing. Deepening our understanding of trauma responses allows for recovery at both the individual and collective level.

The Combs Case

Combs’ defense team argued that the women who came forward were willing participants of the sex acts, using texts from the women as evidence of enthusiastic consent. This is not uncommon in cases of sexual violence; very often, contradictory evidence is uncovered when survivors come forward with allegations of abuse. 

For those inexperienced with trauma work and its complexities, this can often make allegations ring false. The truth is, this happens all the time to many people – and very often, the allegations are still true regardless of contradictory evidence.

A major reason for this is the “Fawn” trauma response. Most people are familiar with the “Fight or Flight” trauma responses, and more attention has also been given to “Freeze” in recent years. The less commonly known “Fawn” trauma response is when a victim of abuse attempts to neutralize a threat by appeasing it. 

What is the Fawn Response?

Have you ever felt trapped in a situation? Even if mentally you know there are other options, they still don’t feel possible? Have you experienced your nervous system responding to a scary situation in a way that makes you feel safe in the moment, even though it won’t stop the harm in the long run? You may be feeling the impacts of relational trauma that make you respond with “Fawn.”

In cases where one feels that fighting or fleeing danger is not possible (due to physical stature, power dynamics, perceived safety, or dependence), a victim may feel that the safest course of action is to manage the abuser’s emotions. This looks like telling a perpetrator what you perceive they want to hear, rather than what you actually feel, to calm them and stop the abuse, even if temporarily. It also looks like staying in harmful relationships because you feel powerless to leave.

How the Fawn Trauma Response Begins

When we are young, developing humans, we are dependent on our caregivers, even if they feel unsafe. We rely on them for our basic needs to be met. When our caregivers are abusive, we learn to be hyperattuned to their moods and do our best to manage them. It’s an adaptive skill that helps us survive trauma – this is the foundation of the Fawn trauma response.

Once in adulthood, the Fawn trauma response is often still an automatic survival instinct. It takes recovery and healing for our nervous systems to learn that the Fawn trauma response doesn’t need to be used in the same way as it did during childhood. 

Fawning, Shame, and Recovery

A difficult element about the Fawn trauma response is that it can come with a lot of shame. Particularly if there’s a public element, such as taking a case to court. Even on your own or in more private matters, you can feel responsible for the abuse. It can be hard to understand how your nervous system responds in survival mode, even without permission from your more logical, mature brain. 

When I look back at my past experiences with abuse, I sometimes give myself a hard time for the choices I made; WTF was I thinking? Why didn’t I stand up for myself?!?!  In my recovery, I learned that the reality was that I couldn’t make the choices I think of today. My nervous system didn’t feel safe enough to leave my situation. 

When I get upset with my past self for ways I exhibited the Fawn trauma response, I am forgetting that I was responding in survival mode. Today, I have the agency and freedom to make better choices for myself because I am not responding from my reactive reptilian brain. Even when the instinct is there, I know how to regulate my nervous system and take care of myself so that I can think from a grounded, centered place and make decisions with my mature brain. 

Of course, I am not perfect at this; I don’t expect I’ll ever be, but my life looks and feels completely different than before recovery.

In Conclusion

When it comes to the Fawn response, toxic situations can become confusing for everyone involved. 

Does a victim engage in harmful dynamics of abuse when acting from the Fawn response? Maybe. 

Does it make the victim responsible for the abuse? Absolutely not. 

A trauma response is a reaction to the abusive behavior, not the cause of the behavior. So when you hear stories about a victim of abuse responding with Fawn, remember that they were not making choices from a place of safety, which would have allowed them to use their evolved, prefrontal cortex brain. Due to previous or current trauma, they were responding from their base reptilian brain, in survival mode. 

The Fawn trauma response can certainly muddle a story, especially in a courtroom where you have to prove abuse “beyond a shadow of a doubt.” For this, and many other reasons, sexual abuse survivors rarely press legal charges. This does not at all diminish the legitimacy of the abuse, which is important to recognize as one heals from trauma. 

For more education and skills about trauma recovery, please check out our workbook, Living with Trauma. If you or someone you know is looking for a trauma therapist, please explore our website to learn more about our trauma-informed team and how we can best support you.